Everything I know I learned by playing video games.

I have played a fair amount of video games.  I have realized that they are an accurate representation of the real world. Here are the top few  things that I have learned about life by playing video games.

  1. Mushrooms make you grow taller.
  2. If you find food hidden in a block or a wall, go ahead and eat it. 
  3. If you ever don't hear music, a zombie is getting ready to jump through a wall
  4. Stores will buy back anything, no matter where you got it from, or what condition it's in, but they will only give you half price for it.
  5. When you kill wild animals, they drop money.
  6. The money animals drop is accepted at all stores, worldwide.
  7. People who leave their doors unlocked expect you to come in, talk to them, and possibly sleep in their beds.
  8. Unless you're in some sort of vehicle, you will be randomly attacked on any trip you make.
  9. A good night's sleep will heal all wounds and illnesses.
  10. If you touch something and it hurts you, it's evil.
  11. If ghosts are blue, you can eat them.
  12. On any long trip, you don't need to worry about bringing food. All you need is a generous supply of 'potions'
  13. If you find a locked door, that just means that you didn't pick up a key somewhere.
  14. Monsters come from the moon.
  15. If you get hit, you have about 3 seconds until you can get hit again.
  16. I always keep a faery in a bottle in my pocket. You know, just in case.
  17. Amnesia is always caused by a conspiracy.
  18. Death is not evil, and may even help you if the price is right. In fact, I had Death help me with my laundry the other day. Nothing gets stains out of my slacks better than Death. Well, Death and a little elbow grease.
  19. It's never the first castle.
  20. Learn to swim. You don't float.

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